Trump Swats a Jab Out of Alcatraz with Gator Run-in

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Sources say the former president was spotted on a boat near the infamous island prison, where he allegedly made a move to offer something to a massive crocodile. Witnesses claim that Trump even got a little a bit personal with the creature, resulting in some raised eyebrows. The {entireincident was captured on video, and pictures have rapidly gone viral online.

Urgent Update: The Donald and the Danger Lizards!

A shocking development is unfolding at Mar-a-Lago as we speak/right now/at this check here very moment. Sources report that former President T.D. has confronted a pack of dangerous lizards, said to be mutated by radiation/the result of government experiments/escaped from Area 51.

Local reporters claim to have seen the former leader battling with the creatures, wielding a vibrating toothbrush. The situation is still developing/unfolding/sketchy, and we await official statements from a bewildered Secret Service agent.

Stay tuned for more updates on this completely unexpected event!

The Donald's Wild Tour of Alcatraz

Get ready for a wild ride, folks! President Trump is hitting the rock/island/prison like never before in a tour/experience/adventure they're calling the Gator Gauntlet. Sources say he's planning on showing off/lecturing about/taking control of the island, wearing a MAGA hat the whole time. He's even said he will order a giant cheeseburger from McDonald's during his visit. This ain't your grandma's tour of Alcatraz, folks. Brace yourselves!

Alligator Alcatraz? You Betcha, Says Trump

Folks, lemme tell ya somethin'. That mess down in Florida is gettin' out of hand. They got these crocodiles runnin' amok. And what do they do? Nothing! They just let 'em cruise around. But not me, I wouldn't stand for that. We gotta get tough of these beasts. That's why I say we gotta build a gator jail - Alcatraz for alligators, folks! That's what makes America great, takin' dealin' with the tough stuff.

Bigly Donald's Wild Ride: Presidential GATOR Safari!

This ain't your typical fundraiser, folks. The Boss Man himself is hitting the swamps on a wild expedition. That's right, we're talking about Trumpfacing off against alligators. Sources say he's packing his that ridiculous red "Make America Great Again" beanie and expecting a challenge. Will he make a deal with the biggest gator in the swamp? Only time will tell!

This Is Crazy! Trump Goes Cage Diving With Gators

Folks, you are not gonna want to hear about this! The Donald himself, previous Prez Trump, has decided to embark on a wild journey. He's swapping his golf clubs for some serious bravery and is jumping into a tank full of vicious alligators! Sources say that this whole thing was a publicity stunt.

What could possibly go wrong?? Only time will tell.

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